I Am Raising The White Flag, I Want Out.

We have created the beast, now how do we get out?

I started writing this earlier in the week and as soon as my fingers hit the keys I knew that I was oozing negatively. Sleep-deprived after a rough couple of nights with the kids had me running on empty. Caffeine and a cold shower only did so much and I wanted to vent through writing as if it would miraculously cure my mood and increase my depleted energy levels.

It is two days later and I now find myself sitting at the keyboard with a smile on my face because I spent the morning watching whales on the coast with my camera in hand. I also went to a local film premiere at the cinema last night and watched an inspiring true story that stoked the dwindled flame of creativity. It was exactly what I needed.

Just sending a text message can be detrimental when not in the right headspace and after I read the first version of this blog I quickly realised that writing a blog can be very similar.

In saying that I still feel that there are some truths in what I had written previously. So I have reassessed and what follows is a piece written through, emotion, sleep deprivation, and the clarity of a new day filled with a morning of whales.

Don’t get me wrong, writing when emotions are high can produce some of the best results. I remember being kicked out of an English class when we had a relief teacher. I was made to sit outside and write a story about anything. I wrote about my evil dictator of a relief teacher and when my usual English teacher returned he gave me an A. One of the few that I would see. 

Is it my age, the fact I am now a dad or have my eyes opened up to the bullshit that is continuously crammed down our throats? The bullshit I am openly venting about is advertising.

I hate to admit it but those sneaky advertising personnel are smarter than us. Nobody likes to admit when they have been outdone but on this occasion it is okay, I have accepted it. They have found the formula and are running with it. Whether it is on the TV screen at night, or on your social feeds that were once spruiked as add free. Advertising is everywhere and just as the magpie hunts for the shiny object, we also find ourselves hunting the newest and the fanciest items with the false hope that along with the new purchase will come a side of fries that converts to happiness. Spoiler alert, it doesn’t.

I heard yesterday that the colour behind the McDonald's logo was specifically chosen due to the psychology behind it. Yellow stimulates the appetite and red is for speed, a combination that equals fast food. After reading this I thought about the other fast-food giants and evidence suggested that red was quite popular with all of them.  I struggled to comprehend that information when I found out so what hope does a subconscious Dodd have against the pull of a soft serve treat at 7:00 pm?  

Our social media feeds are set up similarly to the pokies or slot machines as they are called elsewhere. We continuously scroll into the unknown hoping the next post will provide that little dopamine hit you are looking for or that exciting escape from reality that is unknowingly filtered in more ways than one. I am showing my age not having grown up with social media but came to the startling realisation lately that the younger generation of today has only ever known Facebook or Instagram. It is as normal for them as Mario Kart was for us so how can we blame them for engaging with it like they do? How can we blame them for being addicted to something that is manufactured to be addictive? We blame them for being so connected yet it was our generation that invented that connection.

I have found it hard to type the words out for this. Maybe because it has been some time between sentences on the keyboard or the fact that I have to admit I was wrong. Many of us are wrong.

We live in a world that confuses success with materialistic items. The house, the car, the boat, the caravan, the clothes. We all know it, yet we all willingly partake. It has taken me a while to see it but I want out. I am raising the white flag and I want to put my priority ducks in a line. Family, friends, and experiences that expand your horizons. I hereby pledge never to be consumed by the traps of marketing and to fight the urge to buy new when old will do. Look, I will fail at this terribly but if I express my desire publicly then hopefully it crosses my mind before the next purchase. I want quality over quantity in all aspects of life.

How many people do you know that have a large boat that gets used half a dozen times a year? Then there is the other mate who has the small tinny and is bagging on whiting out most weekends. It takes you a while but at some stage, you click and realise that just owning a nice boat doesn’t make you a fisherman.

I want to put my hand up and say that I caved, marketing got me and I am happy to admit I purchased a new vehicle when it simply wasn’t needed. I thought newer was better and upgraded the 4WD that I had paid off to a newer model thinking it would be the ultimate improvement. Don’t get me wrong I thoroughly enjoy the new car smell, the updated tech, and the reassured feeling that the engine will turn over every morning but at what depreciating cost? A new loan, higher insurance, and further financial pressure on the revolving wheel of debt. I am just one story of thousands but the more I have think about it the more it makes me realise that marketing's perception of happiness that is projected upon us lies so far away from true happiness. (That was a lot of p’s).

Within a few months, the new car pleasure had subsided and I was left with four wheels and a motor. Now the funny thing is this is exaclty what I had previously. I added some bells and whistles because that is what you need in a four-wheel drive. If my memory serves me correctly I now drive down the same tracks that I had previously without all of those bells and whistles. If my mind flows back even further these are the same tracks I used to take my 2WD. Touché marketing, you got me good.

Now I am not here to tell you what to do with your hard-earned but money is exactly that, hard-earned. Not too many people are giving it out for free, especially these days. If you have a goal to purchase that new shiny object then chase the goal but be of the understanding that the shine will fade.

You know what I love more than the new car smell, the old car smell. I like the feeling it gives you, the character it holds, and the fact that you can see the fuel gauge go up when you turn on the ignition. I also enjoy the fact that old cars come in a range of colour variations that aren’t all white.

I went to a BBQ the other day with a group of friends and as we sat there I couldn’t help but look out and see all of our cars lined up in a row. Newer model four-wheel drives and six out of the seven (ours included) were white. Where has our individuality gone, are we all cloning into the same person, are we living in the Truman Show? Are we so afraid to step out of the queue of life that we pick the safe option more and more as we grow older? When did this happen?  

The dream would be to live a debt-free existence so we have the financial freedom to do the things that bring us true happiness such as spending more time together outside of the daily rush that is breakfast and dinner. I am talking about the days spent camping, travelling, and experiencing life beyond the two-day weekend. Call me lazy but I don’t want to work harder and longer to pay for items that bring me short-term pleasure only to upgrade those items once they are paid off to keep up with the neighbour.

When you look at the top reasons for relationship breakdowns you see finances are right up there. But even knowing that we still dive into the depths of debt like it is this jelly-filled pool and forever think that the pot of gold will be found at the next debt-riddled rainbow.

How many of us know somebody who has always had a plan of what they want to do when they retire, but when that day comes they miss working because that is all they’ve known? Yes once upon a time there was a passion or hobby that your work funded but as the years ticked by the hobby went away. The passion didn’t fade, it was just pushed to the side and replaced with “life”.

With the gloomy weather and a lack of commercial work this week I find myself in the studio sorting photos, rearranging hard drives, and creating clothing orders while mastering the art of procrastination.

I often think that we aren’t taught about the essentials in the school. Where is the lesson on death and where are the lesson on life’s priorities?

There is this false belief that we will all live to 100 but that story is fanciful at best. If you are reading this I can guarantee you know somebody that has passed away before they are 60, somebody that reached to open the door of retirement and then opened it only to find sickness. Somebody had planned to spend a few years traveling, catching up with old friends, and putting their feet up. We forgo living in the now because we plan for a grand tomorrow but tomorrow is only in the imagination and far from guaranteed.

We live in a system where the retirement age is 67. That is the age where you can step out of society's highway of work and slow up, live off your superannuation if you have accumulated some, or accept the pension. This is the government's way of rewarding you for sacrificing your body and mind over many years.

I hate to break it to you but the average life expectancy is 83 years. Men are topped out at 81 years and women 85. Let's be honest, mathematics isn’t my strong point but men have 14 years from the age of retirement to death to sit back and enjoy. 14 years to tick all those things off that they have always wanted to achieve. The problem is that your peak physical state retires well before 67 and those hobbies that you once lived for are no longer attainable. The choices are bird watching, caravanning, crosswords, golf, or fishing and the chances are that none of those are going to increase the heart rate and unlock the hidden box of endorphins that you once hoped retirement would bring.    

If you want to break down life and have a quick look at the amount of time we get to spend on this rock floating through space it is but a spec of sand on the timeline of existence. We are programmed to think that we matter and that our time is important but at the end of the day we are replaceable at work but not to our family.

I remember hearing once that if you have enough good friends to count on the fingers of one hand you are winning. As I have gotten older I saw this to be true but recently my thoughts are beginning to change. Your friends don’t dwindle because they disappear, they dwindle simply because in the busy lives that we have created to keep our heads above the financial tide of today's society we forfeit quality time spent with others.

I have heard many times that we live until we are 28 and that we exist until we are 81.

I would rather live a long carefree existence than one filled with financial stress and objects that bring short-term pleasure but lack long-term happiness.

I have raised the white flag, I want to unplug. I suggest we all do.